U.S. Endangered Species List – The Godly Relationship

Which of the following is most imminently facing extinction?
A. The Black Rhino
B. The Giant Panda
C. The Tiger
D. The Godly Relationship

Sadly enough for our generation, the answer to this question is D.
The concept of Christian relationships has been sickly twisted and conformed to Satan’s lies about the purpose of dating, the gift of sex, and harsh consequences for violating the guidelines the Bible lays out for relationships. I hope that this message speaks to you in a way that will cause you to examine your own relationships – past, present, and future – as well as challenge you to “seek first the kingdom of God” in preparation for future marriage.

• Are You “Pouring Out”?
o Love = Service.
 Love is not a thrill or a feeling. It is a sacred choice to be committed until “death do us part”. Literally, when you’re married, barring marital infidelity, one of the two people has to be dead for the marriage to be over.
o 1 Corinthians 13:4-7 - Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.
o If you are truly honest with yourself, most people can’t say that they don’t think this way.
 Are you only looking to please yourself?
 Please someone else in order to please yourself?
 1 Corinthians 13:4-5 tells us that love is “not self-seeking”; the verse therefore directly condemns self-gratification in relationships.
o Are you looking to serve your partner, or are you looking for your partner to serve you?
 Instead of looking at how much he or she has to gain from a relationship, a person should seek God’s discernment and wisdom to “serve” his or her partner. “Serve” might not sound like a glamorous word, but true Christian selflessness is service performed without the incentive of reward.
o RATHER THAN “LOOKING FOR THE ONE”, BE “THE ONE”.
 Evaluate yourself. Could God be witholding "the one" from you because you aren't "being the one"? Think about it.
 Are you being the man or woman worthy of experiencing the joy that comes with a Godly relationship?
o The ABC's of Christian Dating...
 A... A Christian - Christians should ALWAYS date other Christians, and they shall be "equally yoked"
 B... Be aware of your emotions
 C... Constant communication with God
 Without the ABC's of Christian dating, as mentioned previously, your relationship will not be in compliance with God's plan for you. No compliance with God or only half-hearted compliance = DOOMED for failure!

o Are you “Filling Up"?
 Is God your number one priority?
 Girls (and guys, too), think about this quote from Maya Angelou.
 "A woman's heart should be so lost in God that a man needs to seek Him in order to find her."
 Although Angelou addresses women in particular, her principle applies to both sexes. Is God your #1 priority? Is God on the throne in your life, or has He taken the back seat to your romantic and even family relationships?
 Matthew 6:33 - But seek first the kingdom of God and His righteousness, and all these things shall be added to you.
• How can you “pour out” with an empty cup?
• When God’s first in your life, He will allow all of your other priorities to fall into place.

o Are you engaged in sin?
SIN MATTERS. For those of you that believe that because you’re saved that you have the “license to sin”, you couldn’t be any further from the truth. If you feel no conviction of your sin, you may need to evaluate the status of your salvation. Are you genuinely saved?
• A true child of God is disciplined like a child of God.
• Sin is multiplied with passing generations.
o Compare of lineage of Cain and the lineage of Seth
 Lineage of Cain produced Lamech, the Bible’s first polygamist and double murderer
 Lineage of Seth produced Enoch, who walked with God and was taken up into heaven by God without even suffering death!
 The sins that you fail to repent and commit to eradicate now will be trapped in an endless cycle of your descendents.
 If you’re a part of a vicious cycle of sin, then you can escape! You don’t have to be victim to the sins of your ancestors. But you must be willing to surrender and trust God.
o To get our attention about our sin, God the Father punishes us.
 Through conviction
 Through the withholding of His wonderful plan
• Dr. Charles Stanley said, “I hope that when I am face to face with God, that He won’t have to say to me, ‘Charles, I had a wonderful plan for your life, but you chose to follow your own plan, your own will, so I’m afraid I can’t reveal to you what I would have had in store for you.’”
• Is God withholding His plan for your life because you choose the route of sin and the road of rebellion?
If you’re scared that your soul mate may pass you by, quit living the life of rebellion from God. If you don’t, I promise, you WILL miss out on your soul mate.
 If this is you, then YOU must
• Examine yourself under the Holy Spirit’s direction (Psalm 26)
• Repent
• Commit to eradicate such sin out of your life

o Do you believe God will deliver on His part?
 A classic statement - "I don't know if I'll ever find someone that amazing ever again."
 How many times do we hear this on a college campus? If you're in college, you need not answer aloud.
 Romans 8:28 promises us that with obedience and surrender to God's plan for our lives, He will NEVER CHEAT US. If you are 100% surrendered to God, HE WILL NOT SHORTCHANGE YOU! Relationship-wise, God will pair you with the person PERFECT for you. Or maybe you will be called to singularity. For now, or maybe for life.
 And yes. God DOES call young men and women to be SINGLE. Our society has made being single "not the cool thing to do" or "the super lame Facebook status of the year." Most certainly God calls singles to give of their time and lovingkindness as He prepares them to be Godly boyfriends or girlfriends or spouses, but even moreso good and faithful servants. Very underrated, and very underappreciated.
 Don’t be mistaken. There is no way you can carry out the wonderful plan that God has for you without God Himself.
• If you want to make God laugh, tell Him your plans.
• It is Satan’s lie that you can find your perfect soul mate without the intervention of God.
• Without God, the wonderful plan would never be conceived.
• Isaiah 55:8 – For My thoughts are not your thoughts, Nor are your ways My ways," declares the LORD.

o Facing Imminent Extinction – Biblical Sexuality (From Rev. Luke Lawson, Redeemer Evangelical Church, Memphis, TN on 10/24)
 Why did God create sex?
• For Reproduction
o Genesis 1:28 - And God blessed them. And God said to them, “Be fruitful and multiply and fill the earth and subdue it and have dominion over the fish of the sea and over the birds of the heavens and over every living thing that moves on the earth.”
• To Unite a Man and a Woman in God’s Glory
o Genesis 2:24 - Therefore a man shall leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife, and they shall become one flesh.

• The need for physical intimacy?
Is physical intimacy necessary before you're married?
What do you have to gain from physical intimacy before marriage?
On the contrary, what do you have to lose?
oIf you're a child of God, you will be convicted of sexual sins.
oYou will experience shame when committing sexual sins. A feeling of knowing that despite the fact that no one else can see you, the Holy Spirit is watching.

• Sex outside of marriage has devastating consequences
o The idea that sex is OK as long as you love someone = a bold-faced lie.
o Sex outside of marriage grieves the Holy Spirit. You don’t even need to waste your time praying to God about whether it’s OK to have sex outside of marriage.
o Sex includes any kind of physical intimacy, including heavy kissing all the way to intercourse itself. Nothing you wouldn’t do with your mom and dad.
o Hebrews 13:4 - Give honor to marriage, and remain faithful to one another in marriage. God will surely judge people who are immoral and those who commit adultery.
o Wrap your mind around this.
 A wedding night is supposed to be a special time for you and your newly-wed spouse.
• If you’ve maintained purity, it will be just you and your spouse in that room. No one else. No one should be there.
• If you’ve participated in sexual activities outside of marriage, you, your spouse, and all other the guys or girls you’ve slept with will be right there with you.
 How many of us would say we wouldn’t want to give our husbands or wives the absolute best?
o Your body is like a gift, wrapped neatly in elaborate paper – if you’ve maintained your purity.
o Every time you participate in a sexual sin, you let someone else other than your spouse tear away at the paper, revealing the gift inside. When you sleep with many others, that gift eventually gets opened and ruined.
o You can no longer say you give your spouse a gift in pristine gift?
 Do you really want to give your spouse a used gift?

• The rewards for abstinence from sex until marriage
o 2 Timothy 2:22 - Run from anything that stimulates youthful lust. Follow anything that makes you want to do right. Pursue faith and love and peace, and enjoy the companionship of those who call on the Lord with pure hearts.

• Gender roles
God created women to be pursued. However our culture has experienced a reversal of gender roles. Women have become too impatient to be pursued and instead, they, in turn, act like men by pursuing a mate.
The man's role is to pursue the woman, as He is the God-ordained leader of His household. More on this topic at a later time.